Post-Placement Workbook: Conclusion

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Working towards recovery while working towards maintaining healthy relationships with family, friends, the adoptive family, and your child can be emotionally challenging yet incredibly rewarding. You will find yourself revisiting many emotions, struggles, and self-realizations as time passes. There are three senses that you will pass through again and again, and each time you will become wiser and stronger.
  1. Sense of Self: Who you were before the pregnancy, how relinquishment affected and changed you, and who you are becoming as a birthmother and as an individual now.
  2. Sense of Reality: You will re-visit your decision making process time and time again as your life and your relationships change. Eventually you will be able to accept and understand your sense of self and the realities that your choices and life patterns have brought to you and to those you love.
  3. Sense of Responsibility: As time passes, you will become more aware of the responsibilities you have because of your decision. Physically, you will be wiser when it comes to taking care of yourself and sticking to your boundaries. Emotionally you will begin to learn how to take care of your needs in a productive way. You will grow into the responsibilities you now have as a birthparent, those yet to come, and those you have to others.

These three senses will change often. When changes do occur take time out to evaluate what’s going on in your life. Having a good foundation from which to grow will be helpful to you.

Right now, my sense of self-awareness is:

Before the Pregnancy I was:

Relinquishment changed and affected me in these ways:

As an individual I am becoming:

As a birthparent I am becoming:

Right now, my sense of reality is:

I made my decision because:

The reality of my choice brought the following to me and those I love:

The reality of my role in the life of my child is:

Right now, my sense of responsibility is:

As my child’s birthparent I feel my responsibilities are:

Physically, I am responsible for:

Emotionally, I am responsible for:

I am responsible for the following to others in the following ways:

As time passes, these senses will change, just as you change. Continue to take care of yourself, your relationships, and your life goals, taking the time to be aware of the needs that you have along the way.

Post-placement is difficult, but by using this workbook, seeking help, and reaching out to others you are well on your way to recovery in a healthy, productive way. We, here, at are proud of you for taking yourself seriously and being emotionally responsible for yourself and we encourage you to visit our forums and our website often.

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